(LUZ READING) "'Azura,' Hecate began, 'Our paths have crossed only in battle.

"'But today I stand before you seeking an ally.'"

-Ah. -Luz, you're getting all swoony again.

I can't help it. Azura is able to befriend everyone.

Even her biggest rival. I wish I had that kind of power.

Rivals are meant to be annihilated, not befriended. Now keep reading.

I've been sucked into your awful fandom.

Okay. "Suddenly the door swung open."

-Ding, dong, ding. Hoot, hoot. -The book has come to life. Burn it.

Hmm?

Eda, you got a package. It looks like a gift basket.

Probably an offering.

Ah, being the most powerful witch in the Boiling Isles has its perks.

-(KING GRUNTING) -(SNORING)

-Mmm, fresh meat. -No, not eating that.

Witches eating babies is so 1693.

-What is this? -There's a note.

(KING READING)

Nope. Babies are awful. Not happening.

(KING CONTINUES READING)

Bat Queen? Reward?

Who's the Bat Queen?

She's the wealthiest demon on the Boiling Isles.

Get in with her and you're set for life.

So, we keep this thing alive for a few hours and we get paid.

-Easy. -Our greatest adventure yet.

Learning about love and life through a child's eyes.

Not you. You have to return the books I checked out from the library.

I don't want her getting a cut of the loot.

Good thinking.

Now, let's take a look at this little darling.

-(SCREECHING) -Oh, boy.

On second thought, maybe we could use your help.

Well, I better get to the library. Got to go. Bye.

-We got this, right? -(CONTINUES SCREECHING)

(OPENING THEME MUSIC PLAYING)

Huh? Woah.

Wow.

Late. Late.

Coffee, grass and bloodstains? These are Eda's, aren't they?

-Heh. That was a crazy night. -Ugh, I'll put them on her tab.

By the way, we're closing early for the Wailing Star meteor shower.

-Ooh, what's that? -You're in a library. Read a book.

I am in a library. I will read a book.

Shh.

(SNORING)

(BELCHING)

Wow!

-(SCREAMING) -(ALL SHUSHING)

LUZ: Sorry.

(MEWING)

(PROCESSING)

This place is amazing.

GIRL: "What do you think you're doing?"

Ah, I've been caught. Pretend to be a book.

(LAUGHING)

-Wait. -(GIRL READING)

"'We're your friends and we wanna help,' said the Tin Boy with a yelp.

"Otabin smiled and paced the floor. 'I've never had real friends before.'"

Amity reading to kids?

"'Then we'll be your first,' the chicken witch clucked.

"Otabin couldn't believe his luck.

"So, bookmaker Otabin, surrounded by friends,

"bound a book of friendship, and that's the end."

(CHILDREN CHEERING)

Amity seems so nice and smiley.

Maybe I can befriend her like Azura befriended her rival.

CHILD 1: Thank you so much.

-CHILD 2: Goodbye. -Goodbye, Miss Amity. Thank you.

Thank you, Braxas. See you next time.

Ugh, you.

Amity... Whoop. Reading to kids.

Wow. Looks like this sour lemon drop has a hidden sweet center.

It's for extra credit. Don't get your leggings in a bunch.

Hey, I could help with the kids.

We could take turns reading. And do voices.

I do the best monster voice.

Human, do you see me going to the Owl Shack

and bugging you while you fry up owls? Ugh.

Okay, I don't really know what you do there,

but every time you come near me, I get in trouble. Just leave me alone.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

-Ugh, so much for befriending rivals. -You gonna let her get to you like that?

-Who are you? -Well-wishers on a mission.

-A noble quest. -Watch this. Hey, Mittens.

Mom says stop forgetting your lunch.

-And stop being a jerk to your friend. -She is not my friend.

Yeah, makes sense. She seems too cool for you.

-I am? -You can leave now. All of you.

(LAUGHING)

So, you're the human we've heard so much about.

I'm Emira. And this is Edric. We're Amity's older siblings.

We heard how you embarrassed her at the school

and at the witch covention last week.

No wonder she hates you.

I know. But I didn't mean any of it.

I thought we were as cool as cucumbers, but we're as sour as pickles.

Don't waste your time with Mittens. Me and Ed, we're way more fun.

Follow us.

And here we go towards our non-fiction section. (GASPS)

Fiction? Fiction? Is our world but fiction?

Then what in my life is real anymore?

(SOBBING)

Huh? No. Not again.

(SOBBING)

(GRUNTING)

(SNEEZING)

Hey.

-Wait. Where's Gary? -Coming. No. (SOBBING)

You've made reading far too fun. Now stay out.

(DOOR CLOSES)

Amity's even madder at me now. I didn't think that was possible.

No. When Mittens gets mad, she looks like this.

-Woah, I almost passed out. -You're pretty fun, human.

So, hey, we're coming back tonight.

There's a certain book we forgot to check out.

And bonus, rumor has it

the Wailing Star is supposed to unlock some rare magical event.

-You in, friend? -Sure.

Great. Meet back here at midnight.

-See you, Luz. -Bye. This is great.

First I befriend the siblings, then I befriend the Amity.

(CHEERS)

(GRUNTS) Whoo!

Almost passed out.

(SCREAMING)

It's been hours. How can it keep screaming?

Ugh, I hate it too, pip-squeak, but think about the money.

(BABY BAT SCREECHING)

No amount of snails is worth this torture.

-Make it stop. -I can't believe I'm about to do this.

(STOPS SCREECHING)

(TRIES SINGING) Rock, rock. Maternal gesture.

I just had the best day. Cool teens like me.

Call me a library book, 'cause they were checking me out.

Aw, Eda, you look so motherly.

Say that again and I steal your tongue.

Aw, how can you say that around this cute little baby?

(GASPS)

(SCREAMING)

Parenting sure looks rewarding. Enjoy your life lessons. Bye.

-Uh, uh, for the money. -For the money.

Gotta be cool.

Cool? No. Cool.

Keep going. This is fun to watch.

You ready to bring this whole whatever you're doing inside?

It says no trespassing but I'm allergic to the rules.

-And dairy. -Wow. Okay. Just expose me.

Wow.

Come on.

Standing in a dimly lit lobby. You guys know how to party.

There. The Wailing Star.

(WAILING)

Woah.

-Hmm, nothing happened. -Wait.

The books are all glowy.

Wow.

Wow. The Wailing Star magicked the books to life.

(SCREECHES)

(STRAINING) Woah!

Ha!

Ha!

(SHRIEKS)

-Woah. -(LAUGHING)

(BAT BABIES SCREECHING)

What silences children?

What if we invent a TV network for ages six to 11?

That's insane. Uh, there's only one way out of this.

(GASPS)

Apple slices and story time.

All right, brats. Let's do this. Ugh, being parental is making me sick.

(EDA READING) "Otabin spent his days alone amongst the many books he'd sewn.

-"With needle and thread..." -"...the pages he'd mend.

"But all the while he longed for a friend."

-Friend? -Luz, check this out.

Look what we discovered.

(QUACKING)

Aw, cute little quackster.

(QUACKING LOUDLY)

Now he's extra cute.

(LAUGHING)

Your turn, Luz.

-I don't know. -Come on. Don't stop the fun.

-Ah, I can't do it. -Let me help.

I don't wanna see it.

Whatever. We didn't come here just to doodle. Come on.

Oh, wow. Boiling Isles romance. That's totally lame.

I mean, unless you guys are into it?

I think I'm into this one.

Wow. That's a good book.

Your clubhouse is like my ultimate secret hideaway.

We don't hang out in the library.

"Teacher, I'm in love with a dictionary."

"I'm studying the dork arts." This is Amity's secret hideaway.

Mittens has gotten too full of herself.

She keeps tattling on us when we cut class.

She needs to learn not to mess with people like that,

so we're going to find her diary.

And then post the pages all around school for everyone to see.

Ho-ho-ho!

What? Isn't that taking it a bit too far?

No. See, we're her family.

It's tough love. She needs to learn to lighten up.

Well, I don't see any diaries in here. Nope, nothing. Let's just leave.

Wait. Are those...

(SHRIEKING)

Good Witch Azura books one through four.

You get these on the Boiling Isles? So majestic.

Is this cover hand-drawn?

I saw that human girl again.

-The diary. -I may have overreacted.

I don't wanna come off as cruel. I just can't show weakness.

-No. -What have you got there, Luz?

Oh, nothing. Just Good Witch Azura 5, where she goes through her Goth phase.

Uh... Huh?

No, wait.

It's not fair. I'm the only one who knows Ed and Em aren't perfect.

Why do they keep getting away with things?

This is it.

Luz, were you hiding this from us?

You see how she treats people. And how she treats you.

I know Amity can be kind of cold but no one deserves this.

These are private thoughts. Let's put it back.

-She needs this. -It's for her own good.

I wish I had somewhere to go.

Why won't the human leave me alone?

Called my teacher "Mom" again.

Sorry I haven't written for a while. Wait. Why am I apologizing?

Really?

Uh... It's not what it looks like.

You two are the worst. But you...

I've been trying to figure out what your deal is.

Are you a poser? A nerd?

I know. You're a bully, Luz.

Amity.

(LAUGHING)

-Mittens killed the fun. -Again. Oh, well.

We're headed out to go goblin tipping. Wanna come?

-You're just gonna leave? -Yeah, with you.

Look, you guys are cool.

BOTH: Mmm-hmm.

But I need to go talk to Mittens. I mean, Amity.

All right. See you around, cutie.

Amity, wait.

First you embarrass me. Then you wanna be my friend?

-I don't get you. Pick a side. -Please, just listen to me.

Just go away before things somehow get worse.

-(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING) -Huh?

(GROWLING)

Otabin?

With claws and fangs and breaking bones,

I found a friend to make my own.

-Luz! (SCREAMING) -Amity!

-Luz! -Amity.

Huh?

(SHRIEKS)

Huh?

Why are you doing this? I've been reading you since I was a kid.

I know you're not like this. Someone changed you.

But friends are what I've always sought.

And now a friend my claws have caught.

(WHOOSHING)

-Azura? -Close.

Is it drawn okay? I kind of interpreted the descriptions.

-Luz. -Ah, right.

(READING) "The good witch Luzura grabs her trusty staff."

All right, beloved work of children's fiction. Let go of her.

(GRUNTING)

Huh?

(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) Not an Azura fan, are you?

Making friends, taking friends, never be without my friends.

You fiend. You can't rhyme "friends" with "friends."

-Great work, Luzura. -Hey. I was trying to save you.

Well, it doesn't matter. We're gonna be stuck together forever.

No, we aren't. Follow my lead.

-One, two, three. -What are you doing?

Come back.

-Now what? -I don't know.

I didn't even think that would work. I was all like... (GRUNTING)

OTABIN: Friends.

(BOTH GRUNTING)

-Luz! -Me!

You squirm and fight, yet scream and shout.

But friendship always will win out.

(GASPS)

-(STRAINING) -(CRASHING)

Ah!

Third dimension, how I've missed you.

We must stay friends until the end. There is no tear I cannot mend.

(READING) "Luz has to right a wrong."

Luz, quick.

I'm so sorry. I don't know what came over me.

Hey, it's okay. We're still friends.

What an adventure. Thanks for helping clean up.

This never happened.

Wait. It doesn't make up for reading your diary,

but would you wanna borrow this?

I noticed you only had up to four.

Thank you.

Maybe you aren't a bully.

I haven't exactly been the friendliest witch either.

I'll think on that.

Hey, guys. I'm home.

(SNORING)

-Hoot, hoot! -Hooty.

Woah. You must be mama.

Yeah. Yeah. Mama is I. And I is the Bat Queen.

(WHISTLING)

Ah, snuggle dumplings.

For troubles. Eda is owed one.

Aww, sweet babies. Babies? Where are the babies?

And I just taught Junior how to pick locks too.

Your night looks very successful. Look at all that money you made.

And look at this cool whistle that scary woman gave you.

I'd wash it before you use it.

Yeah. We did it all for the money.

I miss my babies. (SOBBING)

I actually got you something from the library.

Heh. Thanks, kid. So how was your night?

Good. Then bad. Then maybe good.

Hey, you wanna hear about my night?

-No. -That's not a thing anyone ever wants.

(CLOSING THEME MUSIC PLAYING)